Guineas,God's Joke to Poultry

Yes,we have guineas.Most folks don't like them because they are noisy.They are,but we like the crazy sounds they make.Plus,they are good bug eaters and hawk alerts for the chicken flock.
If you know anything about these birds,you know they ain't quiet right in the head.Of course when you look at them and their tiny little heads,you have to realize their brain couldn't be bigger than a pea.And freaky looking,if you have never seen one you are missing out for sure!
Everyone told us we had better clip their wings.I did when they were small but it didn't stick.So I decided a while back that after I put them up in their coop I would go in and catch them up and clip them again.

Remember those prizes people used to win where they stood in a plastic wind tube and money flew around and they tried to grab it.Yeah,it was like that only with a loud screeching like demons from hell with beaks and talons!
Sooooo....no, they didn't get their wings clipped.
Lately I noticed they have been plotting an escape.I know what you are thinking,how could pea brains plot anything?

Well it may be a mystery,but is true none the less.I've been watching them.They started off sitting on the chicken run,then after a day or two they graduated to the roof of the coop.I told them they weren't fooling me and I had my eyed on them.They ignored me.

Then a few days ago,while they were up to no good on the coop roof,one of the white ones decided to take a flying leap over to the roof of Hubby's barn.The roof was very steep and the pea brain just slowly slid down,making a fingernails on chalkboard sound as his toenail scraped the tin.When he got far enough down his butt met my hoe handle as I helped him back to the chicken yard.
Yesterday they made their grand escape attempt.They all took off flying and screeching like the devil himself was after them with his guinea rotisserie.They landed on the roof of my shed,except for two ,they landed in Weenie's yard.Big mistake on their part,that little dogs purpose in life is to kill every living thing in that yard.She immediately went on attack.The roof guineas saw what was happening and not realizing Weenie can't fly on to the shed,took off screeching back to the chicken yard.The two in the death yard were fast and escaped minus a few tail feathers,
Then who do I see run around the house ready to add to this commotion,Hubby's mentally deranged female heeler,Beans,minus a shock collar.She sees me and runs under the house because she knows she is not supposed to be out.This dog is smart.The only reason she stays in her nice big yard full of room,food and water,is because we have an invisible shock fence around the yard also.This dog makes it her goal to somehow break off this collar then get out of the yard and eat and tear up everything she can while no one is watching,mainly my plants and flowers.I have no love for this dog.So, she had once again tore off her collar.We have horse wire bent in half and nail gunned all around the bottom of the house to keep these dogs in.After she got her collar off she could get to the edge of the house with out getting shocked.She then ripped off a huge section of the wire so she could escape.The boy dog,Pork, never does this,you have to drag him out of the yard,he says nooo..my food is in here!!!!!!Yes,their names are Pork and Beans.The Boy named them.I have a whole lot of other colorful names for that girl dog,but since this is a family blog I won't tell you,I bet you can guess though.
The pea brains failed this time.It won't be long until they try again,I see them plotting......