Saturday, September 26, 2009

GAA or Goat Addicts Anonymous

Hello,my name is Melodie, and I am an addict.A goat addict.I didn't mean for it to happen.I just tried one,a Pygmy.I didn't know Pygmy's were the "gateway" goats!

Really,it's Heidi's fault.Yep, that children's classic led us down this road of addiction.It got the boy in it's goatie clutches first.

You see,when we first moved down to the Houston area we rented a house in one of the many burbs.Hubby was in Norway,our stuff was in storage in Northeast Texas.Me and The Boy stayed in this house a week with nothing but a blow up air mattress,a few cooking items,a wooden pin ball game and a used copy of Heidi.We were waiting for Hubby to fly home so we could drive up and get our stuff.

I know,Heidi is not exactly military obsessed boy reading material.I read it out loud and he really enjoyed it.I found out soon why he liked it.Yep,you guessed it,the goats.From then on it was nonstop,"Can I get a goat?"

We told him he couldn't have one while we lived in town.Finally we moved to the farm and for Christmas he got a bottle baby Pygmy, Butter Bean.

He was soooo cute and sooo tiny.So when I learned they need a friend,I had no problem finding and buying another goat.

The Boy became a walking encyclopedia of goat knowledge.Actually,The Boy is a whole set of encyclopedias on various things,explosives,tanks, weapons, get the picture,but the new volume was goats.

This is a dangerous addiction,it gets a hold of a person before they even know what hit them!It starts out as a child's pet.You find yourself looking for excuses to go out in the goat pen.When you walk around you no longer see beautiful wild flowers.Instead you think," I wonder if the goats would like to eat that?"You start looking for things to entertain your goats,new toys for them.Before you know it you are no longer watching TV in the evening because you are out watching the goats play.

You can't go anywhere because,really,who will take good enough care of your goats!When you go out you realize your clothes are covered in goat hair or,even worse,you get to church and the front of your dress is hairy!

That is just the first stage of addiction.Then come the excuses.You find yourself making up excuses why you need to buy more goats.We could milk them and make soap,we can sell their babies to help pay for their room and board.Yeah,yeah,that's what we can do!!!I am at this stage.The Boy is far worse off,the only thing keeping his addiction under control is his lack of a job to support his habit!If he had a job every dime would go towards goats and goat accessories.Sigh..that is the life of a goat junkie.
Laugh if you want.Everyone says it won't happen to them.Trust me GAA is full of folks who thought that same thing!Hitting rock bottom won't help either,there really is no hope for the poor folks who succumb to the goat addiction.
Even if you are reduced to living in your truck,you will some how get a camper shell and fill it with your goats.You will sneak them into parks to graze.People will point and grab their children close when they see you pass by covered in hair and smelling like goat,"The crazy goat person!"

Like most addicts,we want everyone else to share in our addiction!So come on,it's just one baby Pygmy goat! I can hook you up.I promise nothing will happen,you'll love it......


Julia said...

Very entertaining!! You mean you are a horder I am thinking...

But really goats, especially small cute ones, are like potato chips. You can't have just one. :)

Pricilla said...

heh heh

We were going to have two Nigerian dwarf goats. That's all.

And erm, we have, what is it 9 goats?!


Nanny Goats In Panties said...

You mention the selling of goats, but if you're addicted, will you even be able to part with them?


Love your goaty pics!

Melodie said...

Of course not,we addicts make all sorts of promises to get our fix!

Farmgirl Cyn said...

If only, if only, we had a place for them. Right now the hen house is full of, er, hens! All we have left is our house, and I have a gut feeling that wouldn't go over well.